Most days you love me immensely. You throw your arms around my neck and squeeze and squeeze until I can’t breathe and I’m forced to unwrap your tiny body from mine.
Most days I love YOU immensely. Your laughter, your wide-eyed smile, your singing, your dancing…all of it brings a grin to my face and warmth to my heart.
Some hours you don’t like me so much.
I can see it in your eyes as I set a timer that indicates bedtime is quickly approaching and all too soon you will have to put your Rescue Bots away and stop wrestling with your father.
I hear it in your voice as you yell at me “Don’t Say It. Don’t Count Mom!”
I feel it in your muscles as you pull away from me, lunging for anything within reach as I lug you up to your room for a time-out.
I smell it in your hot preschooler breath, your sweaty hair as you hover in front of me begging and pleading to watch one more show on television.
It’s ok.
Some hours I don’t like you so much either.
And that’s ok too.
I am your mama. It’s my job to love and care for you. It is not my job to have you like me all the time. If you did, then I’d be doing something wrong.
I have to make rules and set boundaries.
Cupcakes and cookies are not a normal breakfast food. You may not throw your cars across the room.
You may not chase the cat or push your sister. You may not scream at me, your father or anyone for that matter
All of these things have consequences that you probably won’t like. And then you won’t like me.
But that minute, hour, day will pass and you’ll be back to hugging me, kissing me, loving me.
Then we’ll start over and do it all again.
As you grow, my son, the things that cause you not to like me will change, but they will still happen.
I won’t always be in the right. I’ll make mistakes. I’ll apologize.
I hope you do the same.
But no matter what, no matter where, no matter when, know that during those moments when we might not like each other so much, that I am loving you fiercely, madly with all of my mama heart.
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