I am a big fan of the show “Kids Say the Darndest Things” and the fun anecdotes in parenting magazines and Readers Digest. I love to hear stories of the embarrasing happenings that my friends experience. I, for one, gave my parents quite a few cases of “red in the face” moments.
For instance, I broke up with a boyfriend for my mom. I had asked her if she was going to marry this particular fellow, and she told me no, she would never marry him. Of course the next time he showed up at the house, I proudly announced “My mom said she will NEVER MARRY YOU!” Oooops.
Since I love these stories so much, I thought I would ask you to share your funny kid moments with me and the rest of the blogosphere. My favorite entry will win a Svan Scooter! Simply tell me your story in the comments and I’ll pick a winner on Easter Monday (April 13). I’ll then make sure to feature my favorite stories in posts next week.
Sound fun? Now spill it!!!
I have to share this about my niece….
She was about 3 years old when this happened. She was at home with her dad who had the day off who is in law enforcement. Because of his job you can imagine how his language at times is probably not the best…anyways, my niece woke up from her nap and wanted a glass of juice. She asked, “Daddy, could you get me juice?” His response was just a minute. Well about 10 minutes went by, and he hadn’t gotten up to get her juice. She prompted to ask again, and he had the stock answer of “Just a minute” Well my niece as astute as she is, replied fine and walked into the kitchen herself, got a cup out of the cupboard and began to pour juice which ended in a huge mess on the Kitchen floor. When her dad walked into the kitchen she looked up at him, put her hands on her hips and said, “I don’t know what it takes to get a God D*mned glass of juice!”
My brother in law learned never say just a minute….
This one is about me. I would love to post something funny about my son, Rowen, but seeing as he is only about 3 months old and sleeps most of the time… we are still waiting for the “funnies”.
My sister is about 10 years older than I am and had her boyfriend, now husband of almost 17 years, over to the house for a visit.I think I was 8 or 9 at the time. Anyway, I was in the shower and didn’t know he was there. I hopped out of the shower, toweled off,and headed downstairs… NAKED to get something from the laundry room. I hit the top of the steps and start down and I swear the rest goes in slow motion. There was my now brother-in-law, sitting on the couch, looking like he just got hit by a truck.
I froze and my face started to get hot and turn bright read. “SOX, I NEED SOME SOX” is what I said and ran in to the laundry room where I waited. I heard my brother-in-law say “Well, you need a little bit more than sox”. Needless to say that my mom and sister were rolling in the floor laughing.
I have never lived this down! This story was told to EVERY boyfriend I ever brought home and to many strangers, I am sure.
When you live with all girls it’s no big deal to walk around in the buff but make sure you check and see who is around 1st!!!
My 3-year-old daughter has a little preschool romance going on with her friend Colin. One day she was telling me all about him and how she likes him. I asked why she liked him and was he nice.
With a really big smile on her face, she said “No! He’s dangerous!!”
I’m a bit worried that my 3-year-old is already attracted to dangerous guys. This doesn’t look good for the teenage years!
ok, so this isn’t about me, but it is about a funny thing I happened to witness. I was at the Boston Aquarium when I noticed a large crowd gathering around the octopus tank. Normally, this isn’t the most exciting tank since the octupus normally looks dead, but on that day the octupus was really moving around. I guess there were about 20 or so people gathered around the tank when this little boy (probably 5 years old) loudly said ” Daddy, look at the octupuses testicles!” everyone was trying to hold back their laughter as the father quickly looked at the son and said “Tentacles, son, tentacles.” It was hilarious and I love telling that story!
– Betsy
This story happened just a week ago. I was over at a friend’s house and my son needed a change. I thought nothing of it and laid out my changing pd and broke out my Bum Genius. She had a few other people over, one of whom had a daughter named Aurora. She was buzzing around and happened upon me changing my son (4.5 months old). Aurora- “What is that thing on him?” I am thinking- uh oh… do I need to answer this? “That looks like daddy’s!” Whew, I did not just show her her first penis, thank goodness. Her parents were in the room and they had a good laugh. We all had a good laugh at the dad’s expense also. Now I know better than to change my son with a child anywhere near eye sight!!!
Of course, I don’t remember this story but my mom tells it…..not sure how old I was – probably about 3-4 years old. We were all sitting in church waiting for service to begin. Everyone was talking, greeting one another when I stood on the pew; looked around and shouted “Everyone shut the h**l up”. Needless to say, my mom and family were quite embarrassed!!! My son, Lane is 8 months old – still waiting for all the “funnies” and embarrassing moments to come as well!!
Hmmm, since Cobe is just starting to “talk” this might be awhile for him. Wish I could think of something funny about me, but most of the funny stories I have are about my students….
One of my favorites…When I was teaching first grade I had a little girl who frequently had “accidents”. Well, one day while she was standing in front of the class leading calendar, she was so caught up in singing and pointing she forgot she had to go and went right there. She gave me a look and I nodded (she knew the drill), but the conversation that the rest of the first graders had after she left was adorable. The comments went something like this…
“What was that?”
“Was it glitter?”
“I saw something sparkle!”
“I think she had an accident.”
“Oh, my brother had an accident once.”
“Where did she go?”
“Oh, you go to the nurse.”
“Ya, I’ve had an accident before too.”
“Ya me too.”
“It’s okay to have an accident.”
“Oh ya, well, I wet the bed!”
It was just so cute how they were validating each other and I didn’t have to say a thing.
Our 5 year old is going to start kindergarten this summer. So one day recently we were talking about Kindergarten, as we usually do. And Hudson popped up with this comment:
“And we can pick the flowers we grow?!”
I said, “well I guess if you plant flowers, maybe they will let you pick them.”
And then all of the sudden we realized he thought KindergarTen was kinderGARDEN and a place where he would be planting flowers. Quite a brilliant deduction even if it was wrong. We have since cleared up the misunderstanding. Hopefully another visit or two will solidify the formal education opportunity vs. gardening location in his mind.
This is the same kid who told me last week, “In a billion years I will be 40 mom!” Guess we need to work on our math a bit more.
This comes from my neighbor. When their daughter was around age 3 they went to a party around Valentines day. Her father was talking to a man and the little girl came over to her Dad. She saw that the man had a heart sticker on his shirt and became excited. We all know that 3 yearolds have some articulation issues. So the little girl proudly announced very loudly to her Daddy that the man had a “Hard On” (Heart on)… Needless to say their were some looks their way and some explanations to be made!!
My 19 month old is also getting alot of looks her way because she constantly wants to do “Ashes, Ashes, We all fall down” except.. what she says sounds like “Asses, Asses, lets all get down”. I have had to explain that.
Our 7 year old grand daughter was visiting and using a record album as a table and her Papa asked her if she knew what that was? She said “no” so he pulled out the record and her eyes popped and she said ” That’s the biggest DVD I ever saw! What movie is it?”
Ruth McGregor
2051 Old Hwy 24, Wilsonville, Ontario N0E 1Z0
Grand daughter Emily McLaren
While I visited a family member who has six boys and one girl , her two smallest boys James and Michael were in the bathroom standing at the toilet. As they attempted to pee
little Michael said I can.t go. James looked over and said “I think you need a new battery”!