We’re all a little stupid (or how I tried to pretend it was 1970)

Let’s just put this on the table. We’ve all done stupid things. We’ve all done many, many stupid things.

The other day I did something dumb. It all turned out hunky dory, but the fact that I’m still thinking about it tells me how very “not smart” it was.

we all make stupid decisions

I’d been out with friends. We’d all consumed a little bit of alcohol and ended up at the W Hotel. The time came for me to leave and I knew my friends wanted to stay. (It was fight night after all.) So I decided to cab it back to my hotel.

One of my friends walked me out. I was told that it’s going to be awhile due to the block party that’s going on and I might have better luck hailing a cab from a street corner. Unless I’m in NYC, I’m not a big fan of that, so I said I’d wait.

I turned to my left and a young man, early twenties, says “hey, I pass by the The Phoenician on my way. I’m happy to give you a ride.”

Before I can even open my mouth to say “thanks but no thanks,” my friend (male) says “That would be AH-MAZING. You are so awesome.”


We waited for a few minutes while the valet brings his car around. The whole time my slightly inebriated brain is talking to me. “Dude, are you really going to get into a car with a total stranger? This is not a smart idea. This is a super duper stupid idea.”

But I never opened my mouth.

During this time, the two guys are talking. It’s established that this guy is a bar-back at the hotel. He’s asking my friend if they are going to stay and drink for awhile and indicated that he was coming back in a few hours.

Okay, so he’s probably not going to murder me and leave me in the desert because he’s willing to show his face later in front of my friends.

I breathed a little bit easier.


My friend shuts the door, hands the guy a $20 and says “text us when you’re back.”

Sweet. Now he knows that my friends are waiting to hear from me. My friend has seen the car AND his face. He’s probably not going to molest me or anything. Probably.

The drive was fine. He was completely and totally pleasant. He’s about to graduate with a degree in accounting (same as my husband). He moved to Phoenix to spend time with his grandparents before they passed away (so sweet!). He was a legitimately good person who was just trying to be helpful.

When we pulled up to the hotel, he asked me if I wanted change or anything from the money he was given. I told him no and thanked him profusely.

End of story.

Except it’s not. I keep thinking about how DUMB, DUMB, DUMB this was. Because it’s not the late 60’s and early 70’s and people don’t accept rides from strangers. Because who in their right mind would actually do what I did?

I wasn’t in my right mind, which is not an excuse, but a fact. I would never have done that if I had not been drinking.

The other thing that slightly weirds me out is the fact that if it had been a woman, I would have been all “Sweet! Sisters before misters! Thanks for being awesome,” and gladly accepted the offer.

I needed to get this down. I needed to vomit it out into the Internet to acknowledge publicly that dumb things happen and I’m grateful that I can learn from it…even at 37 years of age. I’m also eternally grateful that I was proven wrong. Not everyone is a pervy creep. There are still nice people in the world.

To my mom and husband – don’t worry, this will NEVER happen again.

And to Ryan, the bar back, thanks for not leaving my dead body up on Camelback Mountain.

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  1. says

    I so get this. I have done some dumb stuff, but I hope/think maybe I do it less than I used to. (probably not the case but I can pretend)

    Sometimes I think we’re a little too worried about the potential for danger when the chances are unlikely. Like the world is not as scary as our news and ‘stranger danger’ has made it seem. In any case I’m glad you shared this.

  2. says

    Wow I am so glad everything worked out. I love your personal thoughts because I would be saying the same thing. Our personal fears keep us safe so I am so happy it all worked out.

  3. says

    I don’t think it was too stupid. I think we expect the world to be filled with murderers but Id like to think the world is filled with good people. I am just glad the driver was not drunk :) Now if you got into a car and drove drunk that would be REALLY stupid.

  4. says

    I get it. I’ve made bad choices and as a parent I beat myself up even more. Glad you are ok and that there are nice people in the world still.

  5. says

    My friend and I hitchhiked when we were 18 years old (a super duper long time ago) I constantly think about that and thank my lucky stars nothing came out of our stupidity. I also worry that my kiddos will one day do the same. So glad you found a nice kinded ride home like we did. Bless nice people that still exist in our crazy world.

  6. says

    Eh. Live and learn. Being older doesn’t necessarily mean being wiser ;-) At the same time, it’s good to know there’s still good, non-murdering people in the world.

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