Today I am thrilled to have Kate from The Guavalicious Life as a guest. Please welcome her and show her the love!
Last night when I was at the World’s Most Earnest Bookclub, another mom started telling me all about the different activities she does with her kids and how she is sorry to be going back to work because she loves staying home so much.
I fixed her with my Larry David staredown and said “But do you really? I mean, honestly.” And she told me that yes she did and it has been such a blessing. I must have had a skeptical look on my face because the activity ideas started coming. And she was right, they all did sound super fun but also super easy. So I felt bad, but I had to cut her off with:
“I am sure that they are easy. Honestly, I am just not that interested.”
And with that I dropped out of the best mom competition.
The thing is, I thought I would be awesome at this. I totally believed I would be the type of mom to have a crafty activity each day, lovingly read book after book, go on nature walks, and have my kids help with the cooking. But I am not. And I am okay with that.
I’m happy with too much TV and random fort building and telling my kids that something fun is throwing rocks in the front yard. I am down with keeping expectations low so that cutting peanut butter toast into star shapes is met with looks of wonder akin to Christmas morning. I am a supporter of crackers for snacks and garage sale dress up clothes.
I am the mediocre.
Hear me yawn and get another cup of coffee.
Kate Canterbury, known on the internets as Guavalicious, writes a blog called The Guavalicious Life which is about doing it all, some of it well. She wasn’t a coffee drinker until she had twins.
{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
You crack me up! I go through phases. Today is pjs and chilling in the play room. Other days I feel crafty, but it’s hard to get Oscar interested sometimes so it’s hit or miss. You love your kids and they know it. That is what matters.
Too funny. And very true. I’m like you, Kate. I will never be that All-Around-Mom you met at book club. And while I appreciate everything she does, it just doesn’t work for us. Hear me burp and get me another diet coke chock full of saccharine.
Yes
I think I started as the mom who didn’t just knit all of the baby sweaters but also designed them, but soon realized that my OWN expectations of perfect mothering were not what my children wanted and needed. Often the “fun activity” and “creating memories” things I had planned were too complicated, not mastered to the greatest detail I wanted them to be done, and we ended having horrible time and I was frustrated – I tried so hard yet it wasn’t working. Now the easy stuff.. yes. yes. yes. My kids are happier, we actually do more together, and we have fun. Because we have for example made “grocery shopping” fun family time, because heck, we need to get food anyways.. low key – that’s my solution for enjoying life.
Oh how I love you Kate, and your honesty. Although I am ‘that’ parent who does the crafty project each day and gets the kids in the kitchen, and I do honestly love it, I think I said to anyone who asked (or didn’t) this past weekend that good grief I needed a break from them, and not just the yippee they are at school until 2pm and I’m gonna clean the house kinda break, like a real break, with a hotel, and maid service.
We just had baby #2 and I’m realizing that I need to…adjust…my expectations of myself. This sounds about right!
Love the honesty. Hell, I didn’t even try to participate in the Best Mom contest. No sense starting something I had no hope of winning.
so well put!!! Most days my kids think I’m the best mom ever – and that’s plenty good enough for me. . .MOST of the time – LOL.
Hillary
When those perfect moms start telling me all their perfect ideas, I smile and nod perfectly. As if I am listening, perfectly. I might even fake take notes.
I was totally like the mom you were talking to. Sometimes still am. I’m OK with that. Parenting is…yeah.That.
Seriously, I really liked this post and enjoyed reading it.
-r
This cracked me up. I think Kate is awesome and I am a mediocre mom too…I personally think that those who throw 100% into it will burn out quickly and end up serving TV dinners every night of the week by the time their kids are 12. So there.
I always liked you, but now I LOVE you. I love that I’m not the only one who is good (or even likes) crafting, nature walks, and all that. But I love my kids just as much as anyone. I’m just better at showing it in other ways.
I am so down with that. I am not a stay at home mom because I was bad at even that but I am a better mom when I don’t have to clean up paint for an hour after my kids were half interested in the activities for 15 minutes. I just am not that mom. I enjoy my kids. Love them, love spending time with them and once in awhile I come up with something pretty involved and crafty… but you better bet your butt that I enlist backup and I take a full day to recover.